Things You Just Can't Know
by Azara-Rayne18
Summary: "There are some things you just can't know until it's too late." Why is Spencer always the pregnant one in Morgan/Reid m-pregs? Here's a story in which Derek is the baby-mama. More drama than humor - Derek might die - but there are some funny parts. Slash
1. A Little Estrogen Between Boyfriends

Like most truly horrible and wonderful things in life, it started out as a joke.

Reid wasn't initially in on it, he walked into the bullpen to find JJ, Prentiss, and Garcia huddled together at Morgan's desk, giggling to themselves. Immediately, Morgan's advice from before they'd started dating echoed through Reid's head, "If you see a group of girls laughing amongst themselves, interrupt them. Immediately. There's nothing more dangerous than women if you let them gather in solitude."

"What are you guys up to?" Reid asked, sliding between JJ and Garcia. Morgan wasn't around; he'd gone down to records to get a document from their last case.

The girls went silent at once, something Reid knew even with limited female experience to be a warning sign. They exchanged glances, and then Prentiss spoke. "Do you remember our last case?"

"Better than you do," Reid said. He wasn't trying to be arrogant, it was a simple fact. In any case, the girls exchanged more looks.

"Well, then, smart guy," JJ said, "Do you remember where we found the killer?"

"Herbert Gilsman was working at a hormonal therapist's office as a clerk," Reid supplied, "Time, 3:32 p.m., address, 647 Thirden Avenue, his desk was on the third floor-"

"Yeah, we get it sweet cheeks, you're a genius," Garcia interrupted, grinning, "But today, my precious, I'm afraid high honors must go to me for brilliance."

"What are you talking about?" Reid asked.

"JJ got her hands on a packet from Gilsman's office," Prentiss said.

"A packet of what?" Reid asked.

"Estrogen," Prentiss said.

"The female sex hormone? I don't understand, why would you need that?" Reid asked. Here the girls all exchanged looks and giggled.

Prentiss cleared her throat. "Well, JJ read an article that said that taking synthetic estrogen would cause a woman's assets to become more… well…"

"Luscious," Garcia said.

"And I thought Will would like it," JJ blushed. "But it turns out Will's really against hormonal supplements unless they're necessary for health, so…"

"So, what are you going to do with it?" Reid asked. The looks women could exchange when they were trying to hide something.

"Hear me out," Garcia started, "I thought it would be funny see the effects of the female sex hormone on a male member of the team. A certain… very male member."

It took Reid approximately two seconds to make the connection.

"Oh, no," He said, "Absolutely not…"

"Come on…" Prentiss wheedled.

"I am not going to let you hormonally dope my boyfriend," Reid said. The girls all gazed back at him, their eyes wide and begging. He tried to stand his ground, crossing his arms over his chest, but he had to face it – Spencer Reid being firm on anything was like a bunny rabbit baring his teeth.

"Oh, Reid, it probably wouldn't even have an effect on him. Morgan's got more than enough testosterone to fill this packet in one fingernail. Please?" JJ waved the packet in front of his face.

"We'll just slip it in my chocobunny's coffee, he's not here, and I bet he won't even notice the difference," Garcia said.

"If he won't even notice the difference, then why do you want to do it in the first place – stop giving each other those looks!" Reid squeaked.

"Look, I know you're in love with him, but sometimes Morgan can be a bit…"

"Sexist?"JJ finished.

"And it would be so good to have him go off on another tirade about how women are so hard to deal with and he's so glad he switched to men – don't get me wrong, I think you two are an adorable couple. But think how great it would be if he's sitting there running of his delicious little mouth and we have something to hold over him, even if it's just mental," Garcia said.

"You do have a point…" Reid said. Even he was shocked at the sort of things Morgan could say with immunity because of his good looks.

"Reid, please," Emily got off of the desk to kneel at his feet. "If you let us do this, I'll pay you back – I'll do your paperwork for you, I'll buy you coffee for a month."

"It would have to be two months," Reid said.

"Deal."

"I don't know… I'm still not sure," Reid bit his lip uncertainly. Garcia got a predatory glint in her eye. She leaned forward and whispered something in Reid's ear. Reid's eyes lit up like he had just smelled fresh cookies. "Okay, do it."

Within two minutes Morgan was back up from the records room and only Reid was at his desk. His eyes lit up the way they only did when he saw Spencer. "Hey, Pretty Boy," He cooed, giving Reid a gentle peck on the lips as he settled down to his coffee. He took a drink and made a strange face, "Is there something in this?"

"Oh, uh, I don't know," Reid lied nervously, "They brought in some new beans the other day, maybe it was that."

"You're a terrible liar, baby boy," Morgan grinned at him and took another swig, pursing his lips in concentration. Reid might have been more nervous if the pursing of Morgan's full lips wasn't distracting him. "Oh, I know. You tried to get some of your sugar crap in here, didn't you?"

"Yes!" Reid said, leaping on the suggestion like a drowning man on driftwood, "I thought it would be funny. Can't fool you, can I?"

"No way, baby," Morgan laughed and took another drink, "Lucky for you, the coffee isn't ruined, or you'd be getting me another one right now. So, are we still on for tonight?"

Meanwhile, in Garcia's office, the girls were huddled, watching Morgan finish his tainted coffee with almost childish glee. "Oh my gosh, I can't believe we got Reid to go along with this!" JJ said. "Garcia, what did you say to him?"

"Nothing," Garcia said, "I just let him in on the well known fact that estrogen makes men's nipples larger and tenderer." She wiggled her eyebrows suggestively, causing the girls to break into fresh gales of laughter.

"Yeah, but it also decreases sex drive," Prentiss pointed out.

"So, they'll have sex three times a day instead of four," Garcia said dismissively, "I don't see the harm in it."

"Alright, I think this calls for a celebration," Prentiss said, "I recommend chocolate."

Of course, if the girls had known the consequences of their actions, they'd never have gone through with their little prank in the first place. But how could they have known something that Morgan barely thought about? How could Morgan have known that drinking that cup of coffee might cost him his life?

At any rate, no one knew what was going to happen until it was too late.


	2. Your Boyfriend is Lady Gaga

The few weeks after the estrogen incident were uneventful, besides the fact that Morgan couldn't figure out why the girls would parade by his desk and giggle three or four times a day, and Reid decided to leave Morgan's nipples alone after a particularly violent reaction sent them both off of their bed.

In fact, it took all of two weeks for the Reid and girls to forget all about their joke.

Until six weeks later, when Morgan started getting sick.

Reid woke that morning with a sigh, lying in a too-cold hotel bed and hearing Morgan in the bathroom, emptying his stomach for the third time in twenty four hours. When Reid got sick, Morgan always stayed up with him, holding back his hair and whispering words of love and comfort to him. This didn't work the other way around, because… well… Morgan had no hair to hold back… and every time Reid tried to walk into the room, Morgan begged him to leave.

"I don't want you to see me like this. Please leave, Reid. You're just makin' me feel worse," Morgan gasped, before retching and leaning over the toilet bowl again.

So there was Reid, lying in bed and trying to think of a way to help Morgan without walking into the bathroom, when Morgan walked out to him. Reid stared. Morgan was dressed in jeans and a t-shirt.

"What are you wearing?" Reid asked.

"Clothes. I wear these when I go out." Morgan started toward the door. Reid got up to follow him.

"What do you mean, when you go out? You aren't going anywhere. You're sick, Derek," Reid said.

"Spencer, there is a man raping and torturing women out there. I'm not gonna lie in bed and wait for the next body to show up," Morgan said. He moved to grab his go bag, but Reid was already holding it.

"You shouldn't be doing this."

Morgan sighed, "Give me the bag, Reid."

"At least let me carry this for you."

"Geez, Reid, if I had known you were going to act like my mother, I would have vomited more quietly."

But despite his nonchalant treatment of the illness, Morgan didn't feel any better in the hours they spent at the police station. In fact, the symptoms only got worse as the day wore on. The nausea was almost gone by noon, but it was replaced by heavy fatigue.

"Alright, guys, what we're going to do is head up the investigation by… Morgan!" Hotch barked.

"I'm awake!" Morgan sat up and surveyed the room around him. The entire team was staring at him; probably wondering if this was the same guy who had stayed up for three days straight without skipping a beat during the Hankel case.

Hotch scanned his face with narrowed eyes, "Morgan, you've been struggling all day. I want you to go see a doctor. Now."

"C'mon, Hotch, it's not that bad…" Morgan protested.

"Reid told me you were up all night vomiting," Hotch said. "Nice try, though."

Morgan rounded on Reid, "You little snitch!"

"You were asleep!" Reid shrank away from him. Prentiss and JJ were grinning, enjoying the sight of Reid and Morgan going at it. Morgan had no idea why they enjoyed watching him and Reid fight, but it filled him with a stubborn sort of anger.

"Look, Hotch," Morgan made to stand up, "I am fine… whoa…"

Apparently he had stood up too quickly; the next thing he felt was Reid's hands on his shoulders – "Derek, are you okay?" – and he opened his eyes to the unwelcome view of the ceiling. Two faces hovered above him. Spencer's was torn with worry, while Hotch's was stern.

"Doctor. Now."

And that was how Morgan wound up glaring at his lover in an uncomfortable hospital gown that rode up way too much in the front, evidenced by the fact that Spencer was having a hard time looking at his face.

"Spencer? My eyes are up here," Morgan jabbed a thumb in the general direction of his face, causing Spencer to jump and blush.

"Sorry. Are you feeling okay?"

"I'm feeling fine; all the more reason you had no right to drag me over here," Derek growled. "I've been poked, prodded, scanned, and tested for everything under the sun, and they can't find anything wrong with me."

"They can't figure out what is wrong with you," Spencer said, biting his lip. That fact worried him more than anything else. "They've got their best diagnostician on it, I'm sure it won't be long now."

Morgan looked at the floor. "I don't want to be here. Why did you make me come here?"

Spencer's face softened. He stood up and walked over to Derek, pressing both hands to the sides of his face. "I was worried about you."

"You don't need to worry," Morgan said.

"I wouldn't be so sure about that," Dr. Gregory House said cheerfully. The man waddled in on his cane, looking remarkably pleased for a man about to deliver possible bad news.

"What are you talking about?" Morgan asked.

The doctor regarded him with cool superiority. "Have you recently taken any… strange dietary supplements? Besides the obvious steroids, of course."

"I am not on steroids!" Morgan snapped, while Reid looked at Dr. House with extreme concern.

"Uh, oh, mood swings. That's not a good sign," Dr. House said. The Doctor put his cane to the side and backed into the chair Reid had been sitting in, lounging like a man on a beach. It took one look at Morgan's face to make Dr. House change tracks, "Okay, looks like you're not up for humor quite yet. A few background questions… it says here that you and your boyfriend live in Virginia."

"Yes," Morgan said, "We're in New Jersey on a case for work. We're FBI agents."

"Huh, hard to believe. I'd place you as an underwear model," House said sardonically.

"Can someone please tell me what's going on?" Morgan burst. At that moment, a pretty blond woman bounced into the room.

"Sorry, that's my job. House is just here for entertainment value. Dr. Allison Cameron. Look, what we need to know, is if you've recently ingested a female hormone supplement. Estrogen or something similar?" The woman asked.

"Is that what's making him sick?" Reid asked. His face had gone extraordinarily pale. Morgan would have been worried if he was looking at Reid.

"It's part of it," House said. Morgan shook his head.

"No, why would I take Estrogen?"

"Actually, yes he has," Reid said quietly. Morgan turned to look at him, disbelief and betrayal written across his face. "Six weeks ago, the girls slipped some into your coffee. I-It was a joke, Garcia thought of it!"

But Morgan wasn't listening to him anymore. His eyes had widened in horrified realization. "No. No, you didn't." And suddenly Derek was pissed. "You slipped me drugs?"

"Hormones," House supplied. It didn't help.

"How could you do this to me? I trusted you, man! You have no idea what you've done, you just - " Morgan's anger was gone; he slipped back onto his hospital bed. He stared at his own hands, which were trembling.

"Does your boyfriend know?" House asked.

Morgan was silent for a long moment. "No, he doesn't know."

"I don't know what? Baby, what's wrong?" Reid tried to press his fingers to Derek's cheek, but Derek pulled away. Dr. Cameron steeped forward.

"Your boyfriend was born with a uterus," Dr. Cameron said.

"You mean he's a hermaphrodite?" Reid asked. Morgan shifted restlessly, but he still refused to speak to him.

"Wouldn't that be great?" House laughed.

"No, he's genetically male. A true hermaphrodite is the result of a genetic condition; Derek's uterus is more likely the result of a twin fusing with him in the womb or… well, we're not sure. But it's no different than if he were born with two livers or an extra kidney."

"Except it's a uterus," House pointed out.

"We found it during a physical for football when I was fifteen," Morgan said. He was talking to Dr. Cameron, and carefully avoided looking at Reid.

"The uterus is connected to his intestines. There is one small ovary connected, but he never went through a menstrual cycle, and his doctor decided it would be more dangerous to remove it than to just leave it in," Dr. Cameron explained.

"But I don't understand. Why would it be making him sick now?" Reid asked. House and Cameron exchanged looks.

"Can I please tell him?" House begged.

"Alright," Cameron sighed.

"Your boyfriend is pregnant," House said. Then, with a flourish, "Ta da!"

"Wait, what? How?" Reid squeaked, looking to Derek. Morgan refused to look at him, and looked like he was on the verge of tears.

"Well, I think it has something to do with the fact that you put your penis in his - " House said. Reid silently thanked Cameron for interrupting him.

"That shot of Estrogen must have caused his uterus to respond. He went through one menstrual cycle before it wore off."

"You really have great timing, Doctor," House said. Reid wasn't listening.

"Is this dangerous? Will it hurt him?" Reid asked.

"We're not sure," Cameron said, "We've written down the name of a professional in Quantico you can see. He'll perform some tests; tell you where to go from here."

The doctors cleared out quickly, Cameron forcing House out of the door. Reid tried to put his hand on Derek's shoulder, only to have his boyfriend violently shove him away. "You are never touching me again."

It was hours later, and Reid was lying awake. Derek was on the other bed; he had fallen asleep facing the wall. His phone buzzed; Reid quickly grabbed it, not wanting to wake Morgan up. It was a text from Garcia.

"What is going on?"

"What do you mean?" Reid texted back, trying to be quiet. Derek shifted in bed, turning his face toward Reid… He was pregnant! Reid still couldn't wrap his mind around it. He knew he should be horrified, but the part of him that wasn't tight with worry was, oddly enough… happy. No, happy didn't quite cover it.

"I know Morgan went to a hospital in Jersey, and I know you won't tell anyone what the doctors said." Garcia texted.

"It was nothing." Reid tried to lie. It didn't work. His phone beeped again.

"Tell me now, or I will hack into Princeton-Plainsboro's medical records right now and post my findings in the bullpen."

Reid sighed and looked at his boyfriend. Derek was finally sleeping peacefully. The last thing he needed was more stress, "Promise not to tell anyone else? We're not ready for the team to know yet."

"Of course, precious. These luscious lips are sealed." Reid took a look around him before bending over his phone again.

"Turns out, Derek had a uterus, and us giving him that shot of estrogen got him pregnant." Thirty seconds later, his cell phone buzzed again.

"So, Morgan is a hermaphrodite?"

Spencer didn't bother to explain, mostly because he needed a laugh and Garcia was bound to give him one. Reid wasn't disappointed. It took less than four minutes for his cell phone to ring.

"So my chocolover is a bisexual hermaphrodite with a snazzy fashion sense and a knack for drawing attention to himself? Omg… Your boyfriend is Lady Gaga."


	3. We Need a Peace Offering

It took approximately three days after they found out that Derek was pregnant for Spencer to realize that his lover had no intention of forgiving him. Derek wouldn't eat at the table with Spencer the way they normally did; not that he ate much at all lately. Spencer had tentatively suggested that he needed more nutrients if he wanted their baby to be healthy; Derek glared at him furiously and took three bites of chicken before heading to his bathroom to throw up.

And as much as Spencer hated to admit it, the worst part was that Derek had kicked him out of their room. Or rather, Derek refused to share a room with him and Spencer refused to let the pregnant father of his child sleep on the couch.

Honestly, the lack of sex hurt him more than the lack of a bed. He felt small and hopelessly male about it, but sex with Derek was a huge part of Spencer's life. It wasn't just the physical pleasure; it was feeling how much Derek loved him, the closeness that came from them being together.

Three days without Derek, and Spencer was sure he would spontaneously combust.

Which was how he came to knock on Garcia's office door the next day at work.

"Hey, baby genius, what can I do you for?" Garcia grinned.

Reid sighed and settled into one of Garcia's chairs. "Derek still won't forgive me for what happened." The rest of the team didn't know yet – frankly, Derek and Spencer didn't want to decide anything about their baby until after the doctor's appointment. But Garcia knew, and Spencer needed advice.

"Well, what have you done to apologize?" Garcia asked.

"I have apologized. I must have said I'm sorry a thousand times - " But Garcia was already rolling her eyes.

"Are you honestly saying you haven't tried to bribe my chocobunny with gifts yet?" Garcia said, "That's it, you're going shopping with me after work. Don't you dare try to get out of it."

Reid didn't try. Shopping with Garcia honestly didn't sound so bad compared to sitting at home watching Derek fume at him. Still, it hurt when he told Derek, "I'm not going to be home for awhile," and Derek merely grunted, not even taking his eyes off of the computer screen in front of him.

Garcia drove them to the nearest collection of stores, clicking her tongue as she scanned the possible options, "So, what do you think Derek would like?"

"Well, he needs a new watch…" Reid said. Garcia cut him off.

"Unless you're shelling out five thousand bucks or more, that's not the kind of gift I mean. You want to get him something romantic, like chocolate or flowers…" Garcia said. Reid was happy that he could finally shake his head at her.

"No, that won't work. Derek can barely hold down chicken broth, and I think he'll rip my head off if I shove anything scented in his face," Reid said.

"Awww, he has morning sickness?" Garcia cooed. "That's so adorable… and disturbing… you have lots of soda crackers stocked, don't you?"

Reid chose to be affronted, "I bought them as soon as I found out he was pregnant. I do know some things, Garcia, I've read books on pregnancy!" Okay, so it was one book, and he'd found the whole thing rather disturbing, but Reid was determined to feel like less of a failure as a father than he already did.

"But, anyway, the point isn't to get Derek something he needs, it's to get Derek something he wants. We're trying to buy his forgiveness here." Garcia sighed, "We'll go in here first; they have a decent selection."

As soon as Reid and Garcia walked into the place, they were pounced on by a perky blonde sales rep, "Hi, my name is Amber! Can I help you find anything?"

"Actually, yes," Garcia smiled back, "My friend here is looking for a peace offering. Something that says, 'Sorry for accidently knocking you up by sneaking you hormonal supplements.' It's for a guy."

It was to Amber's credit that she only stood there gawking at them for thirty-three seconds.

Still, it wasn't Amber who found Derek's gift. Somewhere between looking at shirts – "Derek will grow out of those in three months" – exercise equipment – "He's going to have to cut back on his exercise routine soon, don't make it harder for him" – and maternity clothes – "How come these are all for women?" – He'd spotted it in the window of an adjoining store, and he knew it belonged to Derek.

Well, actually, it wasn't an it. It was a "she".

Reid held her in the crook of his arm as he went to unlock his front door that night. She had a kennel, but she had fallen asleep on the way here and she was just too cute to resist holding. Even so, when the door opened Reid slipped her silently in her kennel and set her by the door. He didn't want to ruin the surprise.

It turned out Derek had a surprise for him too. His boyfriend was sitting alone in the living room, a laptop open in front of him and a box of tissues sitting next to it. As Reid watched, Morgan took a tissue from the box and pressed it to his nose, watching the screen with glossy eyes.

"Derek?" Spencer asked gently. Derek jumped, but didn't turn around and didn't make any effort to close the screen. Reid peered over his shoulder.

It was a website for an adoption agency.

Spencer felt his stomach clench. This should have occurred to him. Derek didn't want to get pregnant in the first place, why would he want to keep the baby? Even if it was theirs.

"I'm just trying to figure out my options," Derek said.

Spencer took a deep, steadying breath, "Is this what you want?"

Derek started to shake his head as the tears began to fall, "Yes. No. I don't know yet. I-it's just… this wasn't supposed to happen. I'm scared, Spencer."

Spencer reached out to put his arms around his lover. Derek leaned into him, taking a deep breath to try and compose himself. "I know, Derek. I would be lying if I said this wasn't scary. But we'll see the doctor on Tuesday, and we'll find a way to sort this out." Spencer tipped Derek's face toward him and smiled a little when he saw that the tears were gone. "I have a present for you."

"Oh, yeah?" Derek gave him one of his beaming grins as he stole a kiss. "Is that why Garcia stole you after work today?"

"Yep. Wait here while I go get her," Spencer left Derek and walked toward the front door, easing her out of her kennel. She squirmed a little, but didn't wake up.

"Her?" Derek asked.

"Close your eyes," Spencer called. He walked into the room, sighing in relief when he saw that Derek had exed out that awful screen. He plopped next to Derek, being as loud as possible so he wouldn't startle him. "Now, you can open them."

Derek opened his eyes to see a tiny golden Labrador puppy in Spencer's arms, staring at him sleepily out of huge brown eyes. There was a tiny pink bow around her neck, and her tiny puppy face, which was staring up at him, sent a jolt through his body.

"I saw a picture of that dog you had as a child. Syrup, right? And, well, I have an eidetic memory… doesn't she look like Syrup?"

"She looks exactly like Syrup," Derek said.

"You always wanted to get another dog, and I figured if we did have the baby it would have someone to grow up with. She can keep Clooney company - "

Derek pressed his lips to Reid's, cutting off his rambling explanation and sending a jolt of lust soaring through his veins. "I love her," Derek said, "Thanks so much, pretty boy."

"What are you going to name her?" Spencer asked. He watched Derek play with the dog and grinned; they were already bonding. Derek paused a moment, considering.

"I think I'll call her Syrup."

"Am I forgiven?" Reid asked softly.

Derek looked him in the eyes and grinned mischievously, "Tell you what, Pretty Boy. Why don't you get into our bedroom and I'll show you how forgiven you are?"

It only took Spencer thirty-three seconds to get into their bedroom. mus


	4. The Biggest Slut in Quantico

Dr. Lassiter's office was a shade of blue that in any other situation would have been calming. But as Derek and Spencer sat on the tissue covering of the plastic hospital bed, holding hands and waiting for the test results, calm was the last thing on their minds.

It was hard to believe that Dr. House had recommended Lassiter; the two doctors were so different. Despite the cane, Dr. House had been as full of life as he was sarcasm. Dr. Lassiter was a slow moving man in his early eighties with sad eyes and a serious demeanor. But he had seemed professional during their first visit, and his credentials were impressive, so Spencer didn't question the decision.

Their first visit to Dr. Lassiter had been two weeks ago, and it had been largely a question and answer round, followed by more poking and prodding for Derek to sit through. The doctor wanted to test everything he could, and two weeks later, all the results were finally in.

"I wonder if he's even here yet," Derek grouched. Spending the last half hour on a crinkly slab in another tiny hospital gown was making him cranky.

"I'm sure he'll be here soon," Spencer said absently. His eyes were skimming the edge of the gown, running over Derek's thigh in a way that could only be described as perverted.

"Spencer," Derek said, trying to keep his voice level. "Pull your mind out of the gutter before I pull it out of your ears."

Spencer ripped his eyes away from the stretch of exposed skin, blushing madly. "I'm sorry! But they really shouldn't make these things so skimpy; they leave nothing to the imagination. I'm not so sure I want Dr. Lassiter seeing you like this."

"What, you afraid I might run off with an eighty year old asthmatic?" Derek laughed at the concerned expression on Spencer's face. "I guess I should be enjoying the attention while I can."

Spencer frowned, "What does that mean?"

"In a few months I'm gonna be a human blimp. You won't be so interested in checking me out then, will you?" Derek tried to be offhand about it, but Spencer caught the flash of insecurity in his eyes. He reached out and turned Derek's face toward his.

"Of course I will. Do you honestly think I'm turned off by the thought of you carrying our baby? Derek, I know that you're used to being with people who only care about your looks, but I'm not like that. I love you."

Derek beamed as he leaned over to kiss his lover, "Yeah?"

"You bet," Spencer kissed him back, "Besides, pregnancy is a good look for you. You're glowing."

"Now you're just being cliché," Derek quipped, settling back onto the bed. "You know, I've always had a bit of a nurse fetish. Care to help me fantasize?" He was going to go in for another kiss, but the opening of the door stopped him.

It wasn't Dr. Lassiter. It was a tiny asian woman with breasts far too large for her frame. She took two steps into the room and froze, staring at Derek in a way that made Spencer lean forward to shield him.

"Derek?" She said.

Derek took far too long to answer, "Carly?"

"It's Candi," The girl seethed, "Candi! I know you didn't remember my cell phone number, but could you at least remember my name?"

"Oh, yeah. Candi." All trace of playfulness was gone now. Derek rubbed his hand across the back of his head the way he always did when he was stressed. "I'm sorry I didn't call you back, but things changed…"

"Oh, yeah, things changed, things changed… why is that always the excuse? Here I thought you were a decent guy and… wait a second, you're in the hospital," She brightened for a moment, "What is it? Is it a STD? Please, tell me it's a STD."

"Something like that," Spencer said.

Candi regarded him coldly, "Who are you? His latest one hit wonder?"

Spencer stiffened. "As a matter of fact, I'm his boyfriend. Oh, and by the way, if you're gonna have sex with a guy you barely know, you shouldn't be surprised when he doesn't call you back."

"What did you just say?" Candi sneered.

Spencer stood up and walked over to her. The difference in their heights was definitely in his favor. "I'm saying, if you want to act like a slut, his promise to call you is about as fake as your breasts!" He slammed the door shut in Candi's face, mumbling, "one hit wonder" under his breath.

"Wow, Spencer. I think that was the most vicious thing you've ever said…" Morgan's words started as praise, but died in his throat when Spencer turned furious eyes to him.

"What was that?" Spencer asked.

Derek shrugged, "I told you, I have a thing for nurses."

"Okay, Derek, there are only two explanations for this. One, you are cheating on me and you honestly expect me to believe that you just happened to run into someone you've slept with at the hospital, or two, my boyfriend is such a big slut that that is actually what happened," Spencer said. All he got from Derek was a sheepish smile. "Oh my gosh. You are a slut!"

"I was a slut," Derek admitted. "But, hey, you want to know why I didn't call her? Because you and I got together. You forced every other person I'd ever been with out of my head."

"Yeah?" Spencer brightened and flopped down next to his boyfriend.

"You bet," Derek grinned.

The door opened again and Dr. Lassiter walked in, his aged face even more lined than usual. He had Derek's test results clenched in one wrinkled hand. "Hello, boys. I'm afraid I have some bad news."

Derek instinctively reached for Spencer's hand; Reid took it and squeezed reassuringly. "How bad?" He asked, staring at Lassiter's face.

"Well, that depends," The aged doctor said slowly.

"On what?"

"How opposed are you to abortion?"


	5. I Think She Believes in Karma

Reid stared at Dr. Lassiter, feeling his heart abandon his chest and take up new residence in his throat. Derek was next to him; his boyfriend's warm, solid frame keeping him tethered to reality.

"A-Abortion?" He said, feeling Derek's hand tighten around his. Spencer looked at his boyfriend, but Derek was making a special effort to keep his face blank.

Dr. Lassiter nodded slowly, "I was looking over our tests, and it seems that Derek's uterus has no idea that it's an unusual organ. The estrogen has tricked it into thinking that it's in a normal female body performing its intended purpose."

"And why is that bad?" Spencer asked.

"Well, it's bad because it tells us that Derek's uterus has no intention of holding back on him. It's going to force him through a normal pregnancy, which is something the rest of his body will not be able to handle. He's simply not designed for it."

"And if he remains pregnant?" Spencer asked.

Dr. Lassiter sighed, shaking his head. "The symptoms you've been seeing the last couple of weeks are just the tip of a very large ice berg. His morning sickness will become out of control, cravings and mood swings will be rampant. The chance of miscarriage is incredibly high. And if he carries to term, major surgery would be needed to remove the child from his body. A natural childbirth would kill him."

"But, there's honestly no other way than to…" Spencer trailed off.

"Well, the choice is between you two, of course. But it is my professional opinion that the strain on Derek's body will become too high. The safest thing to do is to end the pregnancy as soon as possible. There's a clinic downtown, we can schedule an appointment today-"

"No," Derek said.

Spencer looked at Derek, who was staring forward, meeting the doctor's incredulous gaze.

"I'm sorry?" Dr. Lassiter said politely.

Derek shook his head. "No abortion."

"Mr. Morgan, I like to consider myself a very open-minded man. But I feel compelled to tell you that deciding to remain pregnant could very well kill you," Dr. Lassiter said slowly.

"I know. I don't care. I don't want an abortion," Derek said.

Spencer met Dr. Lassiter's eyes. "Could we talk alone for a minute?"

"Of course," Dr. Lassiter bowed out, leaving the two men alone.

"I don't want to, Spencer," Derek said, as soon as Dr. Lassiter was out of ear shot. "Please, don't make me."

Spencer shook his head, "I wouldn't do that. Do you honestly think I'd do that to you? I just think we should talk before making any decisions that could… potentially…" He found himself unable to say the words "kill you". The thought of Derek dying, even in the hypothetical, sent a stab of very real pain through his veins.

But Derek already had his stubborn face on. "I've made my decision. I'm not going to kill our baby."

"Baby, in any other scenario, I would agree with you, but you are already getting sick. We wouldn't be having an abortion out of selfishness, we'd be doing it to save your life," Spencer said.

"And that isn't selfish?" Derek asked, "What, I was here first so that automatically makes my life more valuable? I mean, if it was you, Spencer, or one of my sisters, I would probably feel differently. But I can feel it inside me. I don't know if it has a soul yet, or feels pain or any of that… but I know it's there. And I already love my baby. I won't kill it."

"Alright," Spencer said. Dread and relief swirled inside of him in waves. "No abortion."

Dr. Lassiter was respectful, though he was less than thrilled with their decision. "You're to see me once a week. Any sign of abdominal pain or bleeding, he goes straight to the emergency room. Call me on the way. Understood?" Spencer nodded grimly. "Good. You're free to go. Candi will give you the pharmacy where you're to pick up your prenatal vitamins."

It wasn't the most comfortable check out they'd ever experienced, but Spencer's glaring kept Candi quiet. They did see the way her eyes lit up when she read them their information, and the smirk on her face when they left.

"I'm pretty sure she believes in karma now," Spencer said. Derek didn't answer, staring at his hands, "Baby? Is everything okay?"

"I don't want the team to know," Derek said quietly.

"Wait. What?" Spencer said, turning in his seat far enough that he could still see the road. Normally, Derek would have shouted at him for putting both their lives in danger, but now he didn't even flinch.

"The team doesn't have to know yet. I mean, I'm probably gonna miscarry anyway, what's the point of them knowing?"

"How else are you going to explain staying behind to Hotch?"

"Well, that's easy. I'm not staying behind," Derek said calmly.

"What?" Spencer said.

"I can still do my job, Reid, I'm not going to break," Derek said. The stubborn face was coming back. Reid grimaced.

"I understand that, Derek. But tackling an unsub cannot be good for you or the baby."

"I'll take it easy, but I'm not going to stay behind while you go out risking your life on cases. I can't just sit around wondering if you're hurt." It was a valid point, one that Reid couldn't argue.

"Alright then. I guess we'll talk about this again when there's an actual case." This was, of course, the worst thing Reid could have said. It took approximately thirty seconds before his phone rang. "Briefing in twenty minutes." He sighed, pulling the car around. Their go bags were in the back, as usual.

"It'll be fine," Morgan tried to comfort him. "I can handle this."

"Yeah, well there's one thing you should probably know before you get on the jet," Reid sighed, fiddling nervously with the steering wheel. "Flying during the first trimester makes morning sickness worse."

Morgan groaned, "Crap."


	6. Never Send a Man to Do a Woman's Job

Aaron Hotchner could only describe his feelings on the jet as deeply unsettled. This was already shaping up to be a gruesome case. Fourteen women taken and butchered during a two month period. The local sheriff was stubborn; by the time he had called them, the unsub was already devolving, killing at a faster and more brutal rate.

And to make things worse, there was something seriously wrong with Derek Morgan.

All Hotch had to do to confirm his theory was look at Reid. Reid's behavior always seemed directly connected to how Morgan was doing. When all was well, Reid was chipper and bubbly, spouting off statistics and making jokes that really weren't funny to anyone but himself. Which was the exact opposite of how he was behaving now.

Reid was sitting stock still on the couch across from the jet bathroom. Morgan wasn't sitting next to him anymore, and the desperate retching coming from the bathroom explained why.

"This is the third time since we've been up in the air that he's done that," Prentiss observed from her place next to Hotch, "Are you sure that he's okay?"

"Yeah," Reid said softly, but his eyes were still locked on the door. The door finally opened and Derek walked out, pale and still obviously nauseated. Reid grimaced sympathetically and patted his lap. Morgan nodded and curled up on the couch next to him, putting his head in Reid's lap.

"Morgan, are you sure you can work this case?" Hotch asked for the fourth time.

"Yeah," Morgan said, covering his mouth for a moment before continuing, "Just a little air sickness, I'm fine." Reid's frown deepened, but he didn't say anything, his long fingers continuing to make soothing patterns across Morgan's forehead.

Prentiss and JJ looked at each other uneasily; Morgan had never once in the years they'd known him experienced air sickness. There were several long moments of tense silence before Hotch spoke again.

"Alright, then. Reid, we'll have you and JJ back at the precinct. Morgan, Prentiss, and I will go to the place where the last body was found, try to begin putting together a profile," Hotch said.

Reid nodded hesitantly, biting his lip as he looked down at Morgan. Derek nodded, stumbled to his feet, and ran into the bathroom again.

"Are you sure you can handle this?" Reid asked hesitantly over the phone. He was at the precinct starting on his geographical profile, while Morgan was in the car on his way to see the latest body. Tina Short had been discovered by hikers the previous day. That left only one of the missing women still out there.

"Yes," Morgan said quietly into the phone. "I admit, the jet ride was… worse than I thought it would be. But I feel much better now."

"You should tell Hotch. I mean, he has no choice but to put you in the field if you keep insisting you're fine…"

"Which is exactly how I like it," Morgan said, "Reid, I can handle this."

"You keep saying that," Reid mumbled, "But I have a horrible feeling about this."

"Stop worrying. I swear, you keep this up, you'll have wrinkles before I do," Morgan laughed, "I have to go, we're coming up on the crime scene. I love you."

"I love you, too," Reid said. Morgan hung up and parked the car.

"What was that about?" Prentiss asked lightly.

"Nothing. Reid is just overprotect-" Which was all Morgan had time to say before the smell hit him.

The smell of decay at the best of times was unpleasant. But for someone experiencing morning sickness, it was absolutely agonizing. Morgan barely had time to lean over before his stomach was forcing its way out through his mouth.

"Morgan, are you okay?" Prentiss asked unnecessarily. Realizing that Morgan was in no position to answer, she gently rubbed his back until he was done.

"What's going on?" Hotch's sharp voice broke through.

"I think Morgan's too sick for this right now," Prentiss said, worried. Morgan was going to argue, but the memory of that awful smell was still fresh in his mind, and the desire to get out of there was too strong.

"I can take him with me," The woman next to Hotch said. She was middle aged, with a frizz of wild red hair and a sharp, angular face. "I'm going to see the doctor about the autopsies on the previous victims. I'm the sheriff here, by the way. Shirley Richards."

"Pleased to meet you," Prentiss said politely, shaking hands with the sheriff, she sniffed and turned to Morgan, who was wiping his wrist against his mouth.

"Morgan, go with Sheriff Richards to the morgue, and call Reid with what you find out when you're done," Hotch said.

"Sure," Morgan said. Hotch nodded, and gave him a long, concerned look.

"So," Sheriff Richards said impatiently, "Are you going or not?"

Morgan would be lying if he said that it wasn't an awkward experience, the car ride with Sheriff Richards.

"So," She said as the car rolled away from the crime scene, "Agent Hotchner tells me you're the muscleman of the group."

"Yeah, I guess," Morgan said.

"Yet you can't stand to be around a dead body?" She laughed sarcastically.

Morgan frowned. "I haven't been feeling well lately."

"Sure. Just like a man," Sheriff Richards mumbled in a way that proved she wasn't too bothered about Morgan hearing her.

"I'm sorry?" Morgan said.

"Sorry," She said in a way that indicated she was not sorry at all. "It's just been my experience that men use all sorts of excuses when they can't do a woman's job."

"And standing around dead bodies is a woman's job?" Morgan asked.

"Your female agent didn't need to leave," Sheriff Richards pointed out.

They stayed silent until they reached the hospital. The morgue was almost as pungent as the crime scene, but Morgan held his breath, determined not to give Richards the satisfaction of seeing him get sick again. Of course, this only added light headedness to his list of symptoms.

"Besides being brutal, he was remarkably efficient in the killing and torture," Doctor Ellsworth said, looking down at the body on the slab. The thirteenth victim. Her name was Daniela Parish, and she was a pretty, very young dark haired girl. Too young to die.

"Well, we know he's organized," Morgan said, "How else could he have taken and killed fourteen victims without leaving any evidence?"

"Actually," The doctor cleared his throat uncomfortably, "There were fifteen victims."

"What do you mean fifteen victims?" Morgan asked. His heart was pounding, and the ground felt uneasy beneath his feet. Please, he silently begged, please don't let it be what I think it is. He couldn't handle this right now.

But the expression on the doctor's face confirmed all of his fears.

"Daniela Parish was pregnant."


	7. Once a Lawyer, Always a Lawyer

"Pregnant?" Aaron Hotchner barked into the phone, "You're sure?"

He didn't miss the way Reid's whole body jerked at the word 'pregnant', his large brown eyes peering tentatively at Hotch from behind the chalkboard. Hotch noticed it, but turned away, choosing not to deal with whatever was currently bothering Reid and focusing on Morgan's update from the morgue.

"Yep. Apparently, Daniela Parish was going in for a checkup, she had just learned about the baby a few weeks ago when she disappeared. I know what you're thinking, I've already called Garcia and asked her to check the other ladies' medical history to see if there's a connection."

"Good job, Morgan," Hotch said. "By the way, have you been feeling any better?"

"Y-yeah, tons better. I think I just needed some… air," Morgan said vaguely. Something in his tone said otherwise, but Hotch decided to ignore it.

"Okay, I'll call you back soon. Reid's working on a geographical profile now, Rossi and Prentiss are still out checking the other crime scenes and JJ's working the press, so you don't need to be in any rush to get back."

"Okay, sounds good. Bye." Morgan hung up, far too quickly for this to be a normal call. Hotch sighed and put the phone back in his pants pocket. Derek Morgan was lying to him, that much was certain. But Morgan forgot one very important thing. His boyfriend was a terrible liar.

Hotch zeroed in on Reid during a moment of unusual silence. The young genius was paused in front of the map, holding a pin in front of him as though he had simply forgotten where to put it. Except Reid never forgot anything.

"Hey, Reid. Can we talk?"

Reid jumped and stared at him with eyes that were begging him to walk away. Reid's eyes were persuasive, but Hotch couldn't sit there and watch Morgan hurt himself any longer. It was time to go into lawyer mode.

He waited for Reid to say the word, "Sure."

"Have a seat," Hotch suggested, pointing to a chair across from the one he chose and watching Reid sink into it. The genius' hands were wringing each other, a sure sign of agitation. He had to change the subject, set Reid at ease, or he would never relax long enough to answer the question. "So, what do you have on the case?"

The tension drained out of Reid gradually, "Uh, sure. Well, the Unsub is definitely working around a center, but it's not a residential area, so it can't be where he lives. I've had Garcia cross-reference all the locations within this circle, and there's not a single building where the Unsub might live; it's more likely that he works within the hub or at least chooses one of these locations to stalk out future victims. But without further information I can't figure out exactly what the building is."

"And the timeline says he'll be taking another victim today," Hotch murmered.

"Within the hour," Reid agreed, twisting his lips in concentration. "Which means we're running out of time to save Aria Lambert."

"How sick is Morgan?" Hotch said.

Reid jumped and went back to full panic mode, his brain processing the question before automatically answering it. Darn genius.

"What do you mean, Hotch?"

"I mean that Morgan's been sick for weeks now and it's only getting worse. How bad is he?"

"I don't know." Lie.

"Reid, stop lying to me. I'm the unit chief here, I need to know if one of my agents should be taken out of the field," Hotch said.

"Derek doesn't want you to know," Reid said, looking down at his hands.

Hotch frowned, "Do you honestly trust Derek to make that decision?"

"I have to trust him, Hotch," Reid said softly. "I love him with all my heart, and if I can't trust him, then how am I supposed to get through this?" Reid's eyes were slowly filling with tears.

"Reid, I'm not saying that Morgan isn't trustworthy. But I've known him even longer than you have. If Morgan is as sick as I think he is, he's feeling scared, helpless, and utterly alone, and he'll do anything to avoid facing that. Even pretending that everything's okay. Derek needs you to protect him right now, and the only way to do that is to give me an excuse to pull him out of the field." Hotch said.

Reid's mouth was halfway open when the screen behind him blinked to life.

"Hello, my adorable man boys… wait, why the tears, Reid? Hotch, are you bullying my baby?" Garcia's normal cheery voice took on a dangerous quality.

"No, we were just talking," Reid said, wildly brushing the tears away. He and Garcia shared a long look, proving Hotch's suspicion that Garcia knew more than he did.

"What do you have for us, Garcia?" Hotch asked, slightly miffed that Garcia had interrupted them just as Reid was about to tell him what was wrong with Morgan.

"What do I have? Oh, mon cher, just watch me work. Turns out, all of the victims had medical issues in the weeks before they died. Daniella Parish was pregnant, Aria Lambert had a soccer injury, the list goes on and on. They were all kidnapped on the way from scheduled checkups on the way from the local hospital."

"Why didn't we see this before?" Hotch asked. Reid stood up and began frantically scanning his map, nodding and making notes with a permanent marker.

"My guess is, none of the family members brought it up. Daniella Parish never told her family about the pregnancy, and most of the women lived alone. Do you know when I go in to get my checkups?"

"Good point," Hotch said. "Alright, Garcia, I have to let you go."

"Au revoir, my tall, dark and brooding," Garcia blew a kiss and the screen blinked out. Hotch sighed. All that work, and his connection with Reid was broken in thirty seconds.

"Of course," Reid muttered, making another note. "The hospital is in the hub. The Unsub should be taking another victim from that area any moment. We'll have to call the local units and have them… oh, no…"

"What?" Hotch asked.

Reid turned back to him, brown eyes full of horror, "That's where Derek is."


	8. Worthless

Derek Morgan was having a private battle with himself. On the one hand, his baby was causing his stomach to flip impatiently, waiting – no, demanding – for him to empty it. For a moment, Derek paused, staring out of the window with an almost smile playing across his lips. His hand, calloused and worn from years of rough treatment, stroked tenderly and discretely over the fabric covering his stomach. His baby.

"What's the matter, Nancy? Too worn out to pay attention to the road?"

On the other hand, Sheriff Richards was being as brass and impatient as ever, refusing to call Derek by his name. She'd spent the last half-hour trying out several insulting monikers; her pick of the moment was Nancy.

"My name is Derek Morgan," He said, trying to keep his stress level down. Spencer had read some article about stress being bad for the fetus, and Derek had promised his Pretty Boy that he would keep his temper in check.

"Sure," Sheriff Richards drawled derisively, "Fine then, Derek, go back to staring out of the window with that dopey look on your face. I'll keep working on saving Aria Lambert."

"Can I ask you a question?" Derek said softly, "What is it about me that you hate so much? You keep getting more and more hostile, you can't even have a civil conversation with me, why is that?"

"I have a girl who's about to get murdered and you're honestly worried about my people skills? What I can't stand is having an FBI agent who can't even be around the crime scene without getting sick. How are you supposed to help anyone, being the way you are?" Sheriff Richards snapped.

At first Derek thought the buzzing in his ears was from the effort of keeping his temper in check. It wasn't until he felt the vibration in his pocket that he looked down to see that his cell phone was ringing. He pulled it out of his pocket and looked at the caller ID. Spencer.

Derek sighed and shoved the phone back into his pocket. The last thing he needed was for Spencer to lecture him again about how his first priority was keeping the baby safe. Didn't Spencer trust him to know that? Didn't anyone trust him anymore? How was he supposed to keep the baby safe if he couldn't do his job? Did his genius boyfriend have an answer for that?

Derek felt hot tears begin to pool in his eyes. The fact of the matter was that he was afraid. He was afraid of losing the baby he had already started to love. He was afraid of remaining pregnant. Most of all, he was afraid that he would become worthless, nothing but a fat, inactive blob of pregnancy. He was afraid that he would lose his job and that his gorgeous body would go to pot and that Spencer wouldn't love him anymore.

A tear began sliding down his face and Derek turned to look out the window, desperate to keep Sheriff Richards from seeing that he was crying. He turned at exactly the right moment.

"Stop the car," He said.

"What are you going on about now - "

"THE UNSUB IS TAKING ANOTHER GIRL! STOP THE DAMN CAR!" Derek bellowed. Sheriff Richards stopped more out of shock than anything else.

Derek worked by instinct, rolling out of the car and running back to the spot where a man had been trying to stuff a girl into his car. The girl was fighting back valiantly despite the cast covering her leg. The unsub looked up from his task to see Derek barreling toward him. He took off.

"FBI! Stop running!" Derek yelled, but the man paid him no mind. He was slow, though. Too slow. Derek grinned triumphantly as his legs carried him to within tackling distance. Just one leap, and they would have their unsub.

'Tackling an unsub cannot be good for you or the baby….'

Spencer's voice echoed in his ear. Instantly fear, stronger than anything he'd felt before, curled in his stomach. But it wasn't fear for him. When he jerked to a stop, the only thing he could think of was his baby.

He watched the dark figure speed off into the distance as the police cars swung out to surround him.

Spencer jumped out of the nearest car and sped toward him, his brown eyes wide with panic, "Derek, are you okay? Did he hurt you?" He began hugging Derek and patting down every inch of him, determined to find some evidence of injury.

"I'm fine, Spence," Derek said dully.

Hotch walked up, putting his phone away as he did. "We found the unsub. Samuel Perry. He's a male nurse who works at the local hospital. Garcia's trying to find a property where he could have taken the women. We'll try to head him off before he gets there."

"What was that?"

The team turned in unison to see Sheriff Richards jumping out of her car, face purpling with rage.

"I'm sorry?" Hotch said, calm and polite as ever. His dark eyes were boring holes into Sheriff Richards, but she didn't seem to notice. Her eyes were locked onto Derek's face.

"Don't think I didn't see that. You had him, all you had to do was tackle him and we could've had him in custody!" Sheriff Richards screamed. Derek flinched.

The team looked mildly uncomfortable; Prentiss was giving Morgan a slightly shocked look. Probably wondering if he had really let their unsub go. Which he had. Only Spencer looked unsurprised, stepping forward as though he could shield Derek from the accusations.

"Look, Sheriff, I'm sure that Agent Morgan had the situation under control," JJ said calmly, but Richards wasn't listening to her.

"He can't be at a crime scene, he can't tackle a criminal. Tell me, what good is he? Just tell me one thing, why do you keep him around?" She shouted. "He's nothing but a coward. A worthless coward. You're worthless, Nancy, you hear me?"

"You're going to want to step off. Now," Spencer said. His normally gentle voice had turned dangerous. But Sheriff Richards ignored him, stepping around to get right in Derek's face.

"I want you to know something. If Aria Lambert dies, it's your fault." Richards spat in his face and stalked off.


	9. Last Words

"I hate her," Spencer said, glaring at the retreating form of Sheriff Richards. It was a bit strong for him of course; hatred had never come easily to Spencer. But after what she had just done to Derek, he felt that hating her was only natural.

"I understand that, Reid." Hotch said, still looking back after Sheriff Richards as she stalked away. The whole team was staring at her; no one felt like turning their back on the woman, to be quite frank. "But we have a job to do, so hating her will have to wait. Samuel is no doubt going back to wherever he keeps his victims to kill Aria Lambert, so we'll have to move fast if we want to… where's Morgan?"

Spencer blinked. What a silly question, Derek was right behind him… wasn't he? Spencer turned around to see nothing but blank space. "Derek?"

"Hey, where did the car go?" Prentiss asked, walking over to where they had parked it. The only evidence the SUV had even been there was the treads in the ground.

"Derek?" Spencer called again, his chest tightening, forcing his heart into his throat.

"Don't bother calling for him," Rossi said wearily, "He's gone after Perry."

"Alone? Why would he do that?" JJ asked.

"Because someone called him worthless," Hotch growled. He reached the other SUV seconds after Reid, who was already fitting the key into the lock.

"Garcia, I need you to get something for me, baby girl." Morgan said into his ear piece, driving the SUV at very near to top speed. He couldn't run the risk that he might be too late.

"Sure, sugar, what can I do you for?"

"I need you to give me the address where Samuel Perry is keeping his victims."

"Derek, are you okay, baby doll?" Garcia asked. Morgan groaned; couldn't she see that this was urgent?

"I'm fine, now get me that address."

"Derek, what's going on, are you with anybody? Cause you shouldn't be out there alone, not with the baby…"

"Penelope! This is more important than just me and the baby right now. A woman is about to die because I was too much of a coward to tackle an unsub. I am not gonna let someone die because I wasn't strong enough, do you hear? Now I believe I asked for an address."

"3226 Hartson Avenue," Garcia said softly.

"Thanks, Garcia, we're headed that way now," Hotch said. He flipped his phone shut and looked over to Reid. The young genius was suddenly a road demon, honking at any car that even looked like it might try to cut him off, and definitely traveling at the SUV's limit. Which was, by the way, well above the speed limit of the town. "3226 Hartson."

"Next exit," Reid said confidently. It was just like him to memorize a map before he went on the case. If the situation weren't so dire, Hotch might have been amused.

"You're going to have to slow down, Reid. We won't be any help to Derek if you run us off the road," Hotch said wearily.

"This is all my fault," Reid said softly.

"Reid, what are you talking about?" Hotch said gently. He didn't really have time for this, but the need to help his team seemed hard-wired into his psyche.

"I shouldn't have let Derek come here. I should have made him stay home; I should have made him tell someone. But he was so scared and I just… I wanted to be strong enough for him. For our… there it is."

Reid whispered the last part, but Hotch snapped to attention. The shack on Hartson Avenue reeked of evil, an abandoned spot that would have been easy to hide and butcher 14 women in. Sometimes people made him sick.

All they had to do was walk into the doorway before they saw her. A terrified woman shoved into a tiny cage, screaming against the dirty gag in her mouth. Hotch ran to her immediately, calling for an ambulance into his radio. He was surprisingly gentle as he pulled her out of her cage and into his arms, untying her and easing the gag out of her mouth. Aria Lambert sobbed uncontrollably for nearly ten minutes as Reid frantically searched the house.

"Morgan's not here," Reid finally said helplessly as he came back into the living room.

So Morgan was gone. Hotch felt his chest tightening with worry, but forced himself to be calm. He mentally scanned the possibilities, and finally decided that Morgan must have come through this way.

"Aria?" Hotch said, trying to get the woman's attention as gently as he could. "Aria, did you see someone come through here before us? A black man, tall. He would have attacked the man who was hurting you."

Aria nodded, still trembling.

"Can you tell us where he went?" Prentiss asked as she walked in, followed by the rest of the team.

Aria dove for the comfort of Prentiss' arms; once it became clear that she was in no frame of mind to talk, they lead her to the ambulance outside.

Hotch looked at Reid, who looked as though he was on the edge of tears. "We'll find him, Reid. He can't have gone far."

"Actually, we've already found him," Prentiss gasped, bursting in. "A witness spotted Derek chasing the unsub into an abandoned lot just north of here."

Reid immediately ran out to the cars, but Prentiss pulled Hotch back to stand next to her.

"Hotch, there's something you need to know."

"And what might that be?" Inwardly, Hotch groaned. Couldn't he ever get a break?

"The building they ran into? It's a factory for explosives."

"Stop, now!" Derek screamed, running as fast as his legs allowed him. Perry ran ahead, completely ignoring him. Like they do anything else, he reminded himself.

Derek wasn't really paying attention to where he was going. His vision had funneled down to Perry. Pregnancy just wasn't helping him in the running area.

He wasn't even sure when Spencer ran into the room with him. Derek simply remembered feeling the warmth in his gut he always felt when Spencer was near. The urge to protect Spencer, even though now it always seemed like Spencer was protecting him.

He looked down at Spencer, only then realizing that Perry had lead him up a row of boxes. At first, the look of sheer terror on Spencer's face confused him. No one was going to hurt him, and as long as Spencer was okay, nothing else mattered.

Until Perry stopped running and turned to face him. It was only then that Derek saw the word "Explosive" written on the crates he was standing over.

"I would rather be blown apart than go to jail." Perry said quietly. Derek watched in amazement as he lit a match. It didn't take long to realize what he was planning to do with it.

"Don't do it!" Derek screamed, but it was too late. The match had fallen from Perry's hands and into a hole in the nearest crate.

"Only a few more seconds now," Perry grinned widely.

"Derek!" Spencer screamed in terror. There wasn't enough time to run.

"I love you, Spencer," Derek whispered. He wanted those to be his last words. Gently, he let his arms wrap around his stomach. Perhaps, by some miracle, they could still save the baby. Derek knew even as he thought it, that it was a vain hope. How could he have screwed up so badly? Derek held tight to his baby, screwed his eyes shut, and brought Spencer's face to the forefront of his mind.

Derek didn't even hear the explosion until it was too late.

The world around him exploded as Derek was forced off his feet and over the thirty foot drop below.


	10. Heartbeat

No one could understand nightmares like Spencer Reid. He had them most nights, and no two seemed exactly alike. Lately most of his nightmares involved losing Derek or the baby. But to lose them both, like this…

Spencer shut his eyes, tightly. He couldn't live through this, he couldn't. He waited for Hotch or Prentiss to scream at him, tell him to run, so that he could ignore them. If Derek and the baby were dead, he would die right here, beside them.

But that wasn't what he heard. And at Prentiss' soft, "Oh my goodness." Pure hope forced him to open his eyes.

Some sort of insulation in the boxes beside the explosion was slowly burning away, giving them a few precious minutes to escape. But that wasn't what Spencer was looking at. Derek was lying on the ground, thirty feet below the explosion site. He was obviously unconscious, blood rushing from a wound on his head. But even from here, Spencer could see movement, the tiniest rise and fall of his boyfriend's torso.

"He's alive!" Spencer screamed, leaping towards Derek. Someone he didn't know, one of the cops, stepped forward to restrain him, Spencer didn't even look back, digging his elbow hard into the man's stomach. He wasn't leaving without Derek.

"Prentiss, run outside and call 911," Spencer heard Hotch order, and then the unit chief was beside him. "Be careful, try not to move his neck."

Between the two of them, they managed to get Derek out. It wasn't until the boom of the final explosion that Spencer remembered Perry.

"The fall killed him," Hotch said solemnly, following Spencer's eyes, "There was nothing we could do."

Spencer nodded solemnly, before looking down at Derek. He was barely breathing, a wince on his unconscious face. He had landed on his front, which meant the baby was almost certainly dead. Spencer felt a twinge of pain at that, so intense that it made his chest ache. But Derek was alive, and that the most important thing. If he had lost both of them…

The ride to the hospital was the worst time of Spencer's life. He wished for the hundredth time that he wasn't a genius. That the words spewing from the paramedic's mouths made no sense to him. That he didn't know how badly Derek was hurt. It took nearly the whole ride to convince them that Derek had been pregnant, but somehow the knowledge made the creases on the paramedic's faces even deeper.

The second worst time of Spencer's life had to be the wait in the hospital waiting room. The team was there, and they were immediately given a private room. They stayed there for ten hours. Most of that time was spent with the team staring at Spencer, who was staring at the wall still as a statue.

It wasn't until the doctor, a man in his late twenties, came into the room that Spencer changed back into a human being.

"He's alive, and awake. He's asking for someone named Spencer. We're assuming that's his medical contact, a Dr. Reid?" The doctor said. The team sighed with relief, but Spencer stepped forward.

"Is the baby alive?" Spencer said. His brown eyes, the only trace of color in his otherwise white face, bored into the doctor. The team looked at him worriedly. Had Spencer gone insane?

"Reid, I think your confus-" Rossi started to say, but the doctor cut him off with one word.

"Yes."

It took Hotch and Prentiss to lift Reid's sagging body back into an upright position. "My baby survived?" Spencer breathed, staring into space. A sound, something halfway between a laugh and a sob, bubbled out of him.

"It was hard at first for us to put a monitor on the right place. We've never treated a pregnant man before," The doctor said, chuckling lightly. "But it turns out the fetus is alive. We're not sure what effect this will have on it later, but for now, your boyfriend is still pregnant."

The doctor motioned for Spencer to follow him to Derek's room. Spencer rushed forward, but Hotch grabbed his arm. Spencer turned back on him, his brown eyes filled with a glossy line of tears.

"That's what's been going on?" Hotch demanded. "Morgan is pregnant. How on earth?"

"I'm sorry," Spencer said lightly, "But can we talk about this later? Derek is asking for me."

As soon as Hotch let go of him, Spencer was racing toward Derek's hospital room. The sight of his boyfriend, sitting up in bed and staring at him, nearly made his heart stop in his chest.

But Derek didn't look as happy and relieved as he was. "I'm so sorry, Spencer." It was the first thing Derek said, and the last thing Reid expected to hear.

"For what?" Reid said, sitting on the edge of Derek's bed.

"I killed our baby," Derek whispered, "I didn't mean to, I just wanted to prove that I could still do my job, that I could still protect you, and I failed, and because of that, I lost our child." He swallowed hard, waiting for Spencer to yell at him, or perhaps burst into tears. But that didn't happen.

Spencer blinked, surely the doctors had told him… or maybe they were letting him do the honors. "Derek, baby… you don't have to apologize, even if you had killed the baby."

"You mean I didn't?" Derek asked. His heart was leaping in his chest.

"The baby is still alive, the doctors confirmed it – Derek? Are you okay?" Derek wasn't looking at him anymore, and the expression on Derek's face was a little frightening.

"Yeah," Derek said. His hands were pressed flat against his stomach, and he stared at them, mesmerized. "I just… I didn't think that it was possible for me to still be pregnant."

Another faceless doctor came in, her middle aged face creased with concern.

"It's true, Mr. Morgan. Due to the way your body is set up, the muscle in your abdomen and the fact that your uterus is faced away from the front of your body, the fetus had just enough cushion to sustain the blow. If you had been a woman, the baby would have died. As it is… you're about ten weeks along, aren't you?"

"I think so," Spencer said softly. Derek was silent, staring dully at the doctor as her words sunk in. A tiny smile, hesitant but beaming, began to steal across his face.

"Would you like to hear the baby's heartbeat?" The doctor asked gently. Spencer watched as Derek nodded eagerly, watched as the doctor clipped various monitors to his boyfriend's stomach.

And then the sound.

It was quiet and fast, a mere rhythmic fluttering in the stark hospital room. But it was very distinctively a heartbeat. Tiny, solid proof that their baby had survived.

The tears Spencer had been storing in his eyes finally fell. He looked down at Derek, "That's our baby," he whispered.

"He survived," Derek said softly. Derek didn't really know if the baby was a "he" or not, but at the moment, he didn't care. He stared at the monitors, letting his gaze turn glassy, before turning his head up to Spencer's face. He was met by Spencer's lips crashing down on to his. He let the rest of the world fade away, choosing to concentrate on the feel of Spencer's lips and the sound of his baby's tiny heart.

They didn't even see their team standing in the doorway. The whole team was beaming, their eyes locked on the fiercely kissing parents. No one spared a glance for Hotch, which he preferred. He would rather die than admit the tears that he was smiling through. Marks of relief that, somehow, his new favorite family was miraculously alive.


	11. Dog Terms

"Now, you do realize how serious this is, don't you?" Hotch said. He was trying to sound serious, but no one was really listening.

In the two days that Morgan had been here, his hospital room had turned into a veritable well of gifts and decorations. Slick streamers danced across the ceiling in blues and pinks, small outlines of pregnant women dotted the room, only if Hotch wasn't mistaken, the breasts, skirt tails and long hair had been cut off. Yep, there was Prentiss in the corner of the room, humming as her scissors set to their work.

Reid and Morgan were cuddled up on their hospital bed. The public displays of affection were getting rather intense, not that Hotch minded. If they needed a little closeness after what had happened, he wasn't going to get in their way.

"Hmmmm, Hotch?" Reid hummed, pulling away from his position staring adoringly at Morgan's stomach to glance over at the unit chief. Hotch straightened. Right, now what was he talking about? Oh, yes. He'd nearly lost an agent.

"Morgan, I understand that you've been under a lot of stress lately. But the bureau can't ignore what you did. By not telling me about your… erm… condition, you knowingly put your own life in danger, not to mention the danger to the team and your unborn child," Hotch tried to sound as gentle as possible, but still… "If you were a female, the BAU would be questioning your ability to stay on the team."

Morgan nodded solemnly, "I totally understand, Hotch. I should never have tried to deal with this on my own."

Hotch nodded, "Right. Well, given the unique circumstances of the situation, the FBI is willing to term your recklessness a result of temporary stress. However, you will no longer be accompanying the BAU on cases, at least for the duration of your pregnancy. You'll be on desk work with Garcia from when you come back until after maternity leave, which we will work out at a later date."

"That's right, you're all mine, sugar," Garcia cooed from the computer screen set up by Prentiss. Emily smiled and held up a pregnancy outline for Garcia's inspection, "Nope, still too much boob! ... Perfect."

"Wait, what do you mean, when he comes back?" Hotch winced, Reid was sure to pick that up. While Morgan was contrite, easygoing and understanding about the Bureau's take on his actions, Reid was quick to defend him, fierce in his support.

"I have to suspend him, Reid," Hotch said.

Reid sat up; mouth a perfect o of outrage. But Derek cut him off, "I understand Hotch. How long?"

"Two weeks," Hotch said. Reid let out one indignant squawk before Morgan calmed him down. "As soon as you get back, all privileges will be restored. Now - "

"Presents!" JJ beamed, rushing into the room carrying more bags than seemed humanly possible. Rossi strolled in behind her, eyes full of amusement.

"I tried to stop her," He said helplessly to Hotch, who stared at the pile of bags now covering Morgan.

"We girls felt so bad about our part in all this, we decided to pool our resources and buy you everything you could possibly need for your new baby," JJ explained, lifting a tiny soft baby cap for Garcia's inspection. The girls both gave convincing "awwwww"s, but they were drowned out by Spencer.

"Ohhh!" He cried, diving into the gifts. "This is awesome guys, thanks so much…" Spencer pulled out a toy from the nearest bag and began tampering with it, trying to discover its use.

"Yeah, this is amazing," Derek laughed, "But Disney Princess diapers? We don't know the sex of the baby yet, doesn't this seem a little-?"

"Oh, it has to be a girl," Garcia said, "Can you imagine Spencer's eyes on a sweet little girl? But even if it is a little man, with your genes, he'll be able to pull off Disney Princess diapers any day."

"Alright, then," Derek laughed, watching as his husband tore through the bags.

"We admit, the news that you boys were going to be daddies, especially, well, this way threw us for a bit of a loop," Prentiss explained, "But now that we've come to terms with it, we've decided to be the best aunties we can possibly be."

"And that means spoiling the little one," JJ grinned.

"Excuse me?"

The party stopped as all members of the BAU turned to the door. Sheriff Richards stood there, one hand still on the doorknob as her angular face thrust forward into the room.

"Yes?" Hotch said.

"Agent Hotchner," Richards sniffed, "I just wanted to let you know that all the paperwork regarding the case has been sent in. Perry's death has officially been ruled no fault of your teams." Sheriff Richards looked rather disappointed by the news.

"Thank you for the information," Hotch said stiffly. He made a move towards the door, but Richards breezed past it.

"So your boyfriend really did get you knocked up," Richards said, "Well, color me surprised."

"Guess a man can do a woman's job, huh?" Morgan said quietly. Reid glared at her from beside him, refusing to speak.

"We'll see," Sheriff Richards said, looking with distain at the dolls above her head. Prentiss accidently snipped the head off of one in the corner. "You know, I never pegged you for a fag." She said breezily, "Your boyfriend here, sure, he's flaming, but you came as a surprise."

"Now, Sheriff," Hotch began, but Richards cut him off.

"Oh, I don't mean anything by it, you know that. Just like Nancy, little jokes I come up with to separate the men from the girls. Although, you don't really seem to have that line all sorted out yourself, do you?" She laughed heartily. No one joined her. "Now, I don't know the technical name for your baby, but I do raise dogs, and looking between you and Casper here, I think the technical term for your baby is a mutt. Dog terms, you understand."

Reid and Morgan stared at her in utter shock for a moment. Reid came to his senses first, smiling angelically as he walked up to her, "That's funny, because the first technical term that came to mind when I thought of you was bitch."

Richards's face suddenly matched her hair, "Wha-?"

"Dog terms," Reid said sweetly.

"Agent Hotchner," She blustered, "I think you should know that I am ready to report your agent for gross misconduct-"

"Go ahead," Hotch said darkly. "You won't get far. I think between racism, disparaging comments, sexism and homophobia, it'll really be a tossup what you get fired for first."

Sheriff Richards blanched and stalked out the door.

"Thanks, Hotch," Spencer took one last moment to glare at the woman's retreating back.

"Consider it my gift," Hotch said solemnly. Spencer beamed, going back to sorting through the bags on his boyfriend's bed.


	12. Domestic Life and Baby Names

The first day Spencer was forced to go to work without his boyfriend was difficult. Derek didn't seem too bothered about it, ready to kick up his swelling feet and curl up on the couch with some old football games he'd never gotten around to watching. But Spencer couldn't get over the _unfairness_ of it.

"You shouldn't have been suspended."

"I put the whole bureau in danger, Spencer. Hotch was being lenient with me and you know it."

Spencer did know it, but that didn't mean he had to like it. He pouted, his hand on his go bag, not quite ready to leave his boyfriend behind. Derek beamed, white teeth shining in his handsome face. "I don't like having to leave you. I don't like having to leave our baby."

Derek's lips closed, but the smile stretched wider, "You aren't leaving us alone. We've got each other until you get back. And Syrup, of course."

Spencer turned to their puppy. Syrup wagged her tail, large eyes staring up at them, "Are you going to take care of him while I'm gone?" The puppy barked, and Spencer smiled. He leaned in to kiss his boyfriend, one hand pressing against where Morgan's body was carrying their baby.

They'd gone to Dr. Lassiter the day they'd arrived back in Quantico. The gruff old man hadn't been happy with Morgan's activities, but he was glad to hear the man was off of active duty, "It's what you should have been doing from the instant the pregnancy was discovered." He had, however, confirmed all the men's hopes; the pregnancy was still progressing, their baby still healthy. A miracle, he'd said, and Derek and Spencer couldn't help but agree.

Derek spent the first afternoon Reid was out of town alternating between the couch and the bathroom. Nausea was not his friend, though he was more than willing to suffer it for a healthy baby. It wasn't quite as bad on day two; and Morgan spent the day indulging his cravings without being judged and watching the last of the football games he still had to catch up on.

By the third day, Derek was decidedly bored. He played catch with Syrup for a few hours, and then watched the puppy fall into a nap. The little yellow puppy yawned and settled into her bed, refusing to answer Derek's calls to play. Morgan sighed and gave up, retreating into daydreams of his own.

He often wondered what his child would be like. Boy or girl was the first question; Derek had no idea what he'd be getting, and frankly, he didn't care. He'd never really seen himself as the daddy of a boy or girl in particular. He imagined his own skin tone, lightened by Reid's, and thick dark curls. The kid had to be smart, he reasoned, with his or her daddy's brains.

Yep, smart and sweet and shy like Spencer, brave and strong like him. Derek hoped for the baby's sake that it didn't inherit Spencer's social awkwardness or his propensity for jumping into things without thinking of his own safety. Stupidity, his mother called it. She said he'd gotten it from his father. Derek frowned. His baby would never meet his father.

The fourth day with Reid gone, Morgan spent the morning talking to his boyfriend.

"I'm bored out of my mind," Derek said. "All I've been doing is thinking about when you'll be back."

"I'll be back soon," Reid promised, "We're really close to catching this guy; I've got the geographical profile narrowed down to a three mile radius. I would have had it earlier, but all I can think about is you."

"Don't let me distract you," Morgan said. "We need somebody to be the bread winner around here…" He picked at a thread on the blanket covering his lap, "So, I've been thinking about something."

"Yeah?"

"Well, our kid. I was thinking about what to name him."

"Him?"

"Or her," Morgan said, "I don't feel right calling our child it, you know? But yeah, I started thinking about baby names yesterday."

"Oh, yeah," Reid had put a pen in his mouth; Derek could hear his boyfriend trying to talk around it. He smiled, "I've thought about that, too. I was thinking maybe something with a lot of history, maybe an old saint's name, like Amatus or Nicomedes. And for a girl, maybe something like Eugenia-"

"Yeah, I don't think so," Derek said, rubbing a hand over his stomach.

"Okay," Spencer didn't seem to mind, his voice as chipper as always, "What were you thinking?"

"I don't know. Something nice and classic. I thought about Michael for a boy, after my dad. And for a girl, I thought maybe Angelina or Cassandra. Something kinda frilly, you know?"

"Those are nice," Spencer said absently, "Garcia was telling me about how we needed to call her Penelope. And, of course, Jennifer and Emily."

Morgan laughed, "Did she now? Penelope's cute…."

"But JJ and Prentiss are out of luck?"

"Tell them I'll think about it," Morgan said. Spencer laughed at the other end of the line, filling his boyfriend with the warm feeling he always got from knowing that Spencer was happy. He wracked his brain for more names – pregnancy seemed to be messing with his memory as well as his body. "I kinda like Isabelle."

"That's pretty," Spencer said, "Hey; I have to go, one of the officers has to talk to me about my profile. But I love you, and I'm going to be home soon, okay? Try taking a nap, you need a lot of rest for the baby."

"Yeah, I know. I love you, too."

Morgan took his boyfriend's advice, going to sleep and only waking up when Spencer arrived home that night. Derek woke up to Spencer's lips on his forehead, and his baby boy's soft hands in his. He smiled and leaned into his boyfriend. Domestic life was rather nice in some ways.

But he couldn't wait for this suspension to be over.


End file.
